Eileen Cashbaugh first found herself in West Clinic in 2000, staring at the antiseptic walls of treatment rooms as she assisted her mother in her battle with lung cancer. Four years later, she stared at the walls again, after finding a lump in her breast that sent her on a journey through lumpectomy, recurrence and double mastectomy. But this time, she noticed the more comforting, colorful walls full of art created by cancer patients in the waiting area, known as the Wings Gallery.
     “I was thinking maybe I could do that. Maybe I could paint and have a painting there. Within a year, I had a painting in that gallery, and I was delighted and surprised I could paint something someone else would enjoy,” Eileen said. In 2005, she began art classes as a stress reliever to cope with the aftermath of radical surgery and treatment. In her quest to relieve anxiety, she found a hobby in acrylics and oils that transformed into a passion and then into a career. This outlet helped her face her darkest fears.
     “After cancer, there is the constant worry of recurrence, and it can take over your entire life. For me, the single most therapeutic thing I did was start painting. It occupied my mind both in front of and away from the canvas,” she said.
     Eileen was a nurse in both clinical and administrative settings before the cancer. She had been a nurse since 1976 as she and her husband traveled the country with his military career. Married 30 years to a Navy pilot, Eileen has lived in Florida, California, Hawaii, Washington, D.C., and many other places. A Memphian for 10 years, she said this is where she has lived the longest in her married life. Her husband, now retired, works as a civilian for the Department of the Navy.
     Her nursing career probably did not help her anxiety about cancer, for back in the 70s and 80s when she was a medical-surgical nurse, the treatments were harsher. The surgery was more mutilating and the chances for survival were not as good. While Eileen’s mother lived with her during her treatment and West Clinic, she was able to see all the advances in cancer care. There were anti-nausea drugs, and there were many more options. Treatments were less invasive.
     Self-described as someone prone to anxiety, Eileen used humor to soften the rough edges of her experience and release stress. Her outlook and personality comes through in her art.
     “She has a quirky side--a unique sense of humor,” said Sally Hensley, L.C.S.W., programs coordinator for Wings, who has known her for many years as a co-worker, artist and friend. “She is bright, creative and above all authentic. She is the real deal.”
     Chosen 2009 Artist of the Year at the Wings gallery, Eileen’s winning painting (and our cover art) is titled “Jugularity,” a play on the word “jocularity.” The work is an interesting fusion of whimsical and medical, as a phrenology chart sections the chemo-induced bald head of the subject and a hand suspiciously looking like an X-ray holds a flower and flanks the words “Ha, ha, ha.” A long throat, jugular exposed (cancer goes for the jugular, Eileen explains) is “tattooed” with the words “Take time to laugh—it is the music of the soul.” Highlighted sections of the phrenology chart are hope and mirthfulness, which the artist said “are always cancer cures for me.” She painted it on one of the anniversaries of her diagnosis.
     While exhibited artists at the Wings Gallery go through a submission process and review by committee, selection of Artist of the Year is a more informal process with staff looking for certain qualities, said Sarah Blackburn, development manager and Wings Gallery curator.
     “We really get to know the artist while they are here going through treatment. Eileen was here going through our support groups and we just love her. We are looking for cheerful and hopeful work,” she said. “We knew how she was using art to help her through her treatments. She gets it. She understands the mission of Wings. She understands the benefits of art to the patient.”
     Now active in the Women with Wings Cancer Survivors group, Eileen notes a new resilience in her spirit. If she had not gotten cancer, she would never have painted, she said.
     “Cancer gave me a new attitude,” she said. “It helped me express myself without setting limits or feeling self-conscious, because I had nothing to lose. There was some benefit out of getting cancer.”