Eileen
Cashbaugh first found herself in West Clinic in 2000, staring at the
antiseptic walls of treatment rooms as she assisted her mother in her
battle with lung cancer. Four years later, she stared at the walls
again, after finding a lump in her breast that sent her on a journey
through lumpectomy, recurrence and double mastectomy. But this time, she
noticed the more comforting, colorful walls full of art created by
cancer patients in the waiting area, known as the Wings Gallery.
“I
was thinking maybe I could do that. Maybe I could paint and have a
painting there. Within a year, I had a painting in that gallery, and I
was delighted and surprised I could paint something someone else would
enjoy,” Eileen said. In 2005, she began art classes as a stress reliever
to cope with the aftermath of radical surgery and treatment. In her
quest to relieve anxiety, she found a hobby in acrylics and oils that
transformed into a passion and then into a career. This outlet helped
her face her darkest fears.
“After
cancer, there is the constant worry of recurrence, and it can take over
your entire life. For me, the single most therapeutic thing I did was
start painting. It occupied my mind both in front of and away from the
canvas,” she said.
Eileen
was a nurse in both clinical and administrative settings before the
cancer. She had been a nurse since 1976 as she and her husband traveled
the country with his military career. Married 30 years to a Navy pilot,
Eileen has lived in Florida, California, Hawaii, Washington, D.C., and
many other places. A Memphian for 10 years, she said this is where she
has lived the longest in her married life. Her husband, now retired,
works as a civilian for the Department of the Navy.
Her
nursing career probably did not help her anxiety about cancer, for back
in the 70s and 80s when she was a medical-surgical nurse, the
treatments were harsher. The surgery was more mutilating and the chances
for survival were not as good. While Eileen’s mother lived with her
during her treatment and West Clinic, she was able to see all the
advances in cancer care. There were anti-nausea drugs, and there were
many more options. Treatments were less invasive.
Self-described
as someone prone to anxiety, Eileen used humor to soften the rough
edges of her experience and release stress. Her outlook and personality
comes through in her art.“
She
has a quirky side--a unique sense of humor,” said Sally Hensley,
L.C.S.W., programs coordinator for Wings, who has known her for many
years as a co-worker, artist and friend. “She is bright, creative and
above all authentic. She is the real deal.”
Chosen
2009 Artist of the Year at the Wings gallery, Eileen’s winning painting
(and our cover art) is titled “Jugularity,” a play on the word
“jocularity.” The work is an interesting fusion of whimsical and
medical, as a phrenology chart sections the chemo-induced bald head of
the subject and a hand suspiciously looking like an X-ray holds a flower
and flanks the words “Ha, ha, ha.” A long throat, jugular exposed
(cancer goes for the jugular, Eileen explains) is “tattooed” with the
words “Take time to laugh—it is the music of the soul.” Highlighted
sections of the phrenology chart are hope and mirthfulness, which the
artist said “are always cancer cures for me.” She painted it on one of
the anniversaries of her diagnosis.
While
exhibited artists at the Wings Gallery go through a submission process
and review by committee, selection of Artist of the Year is a more
informal process with staff looking for certain qualities, said Sarah
Blackburn, development manager and Wings Gallery curator. “
We
really get to know the artist while they are here going through
treatment. Eileen was here going through our support groups and we just
love her. We are looking for cheerful and hopeful work,” she said. “We
knew how she was using art to help her through her treatments. She gets
it. She understands the mission of Wings. She understands the benefits
of art to the patient.”
Now
active in the Women with Wings Cancer Survivors group, Eileen notes a
new resilience in her spirit. If she had not gotten cancer, she would
never have painted, she said.“
Cancer
gave me a new attitude,” she said. “It helped me express myself without
setting limits or feeling self-conscious, because I had nothing to
lose. There was some benefit out of getting cancer.”
She
has also found a new career from her cancer experience. She is one of
the "Artists in Residence" at the Memphis Botanic Garden under the
instruction of Marilyn Wannamaker. Eileen’s work also has been displayed
in group shows at the Gardens and the Wings Gallery. Some of her pieces
are currently being offered at Artists on Central.
This article was written by Good Health Magazine and was featured in their August 2009 magazine.